06 September 2007

Moronic Moment of the Month*

*brought to you by Seventeen Magazine

It's long overdue, but the vacay threw my schedule off. So as a reward for your patience, I now bring you a supersized Moronic Moment of the Month. (And next month's installment should come in just a couple weeks! Yay, morons!)

There was lots and lots of fodder this month, and it was some work to pare it down to just these few examples. Let's start with this photo, at left, which is ostensibly showing us the young girl's shoes. Never mind that the little nymph has arched her back and appears to be grinding down on the fence, her hand delicately placed between her legs. It's about shoes. We know this because of the big word "SHOES" in the red box. Ahem.

There's also this photo, under the caption "I (heart) being tall," wherein they actually encourage teenage girls to kick it carny style:Elsewhere, Sorich takes issue with an alleged doctor's proclamation in a sex Q&A column. Read it for yourself. So, the doctor says "Not True!" And to this, Sonya says, "A big false." Which is to say, once you have sex, you may crave it all the time, I guess. Or hope. I can't speak for girls (thankfully), but guys are pretty much obsessed with it -- before and after they have it for the first time.

The ultimate moronic moment goes to something much tamer in topic. Here's the photo:

Let's start with the obvious. Nobody can wear a giant squirrel on her dress without taking enough derision to prompt a "Carrie"-style explosion of rage. (Oh wait. This is an outfit to wear to a student council meeting. Maybe it would be fine, then...) But the true idiocy is buried in her quote, wherein she says that student council rep is an important position, with big projects like making posters.

Ugh. There is no hope, people.

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